


anal flippering

by Anonymous



Category: Club Penguin, Original Work
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Fisting, Anal Sex, Crack, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, First Time, Humor, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post Mission Fic, Post-Canon, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, again - this is CRACK, bottom rookie, fish slime as lube, penguin sex, penguins dont have dicks so this is just an amalgamation of marine animal anatomy, potential verse content, top jet pack guy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:36:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26310499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: “I saw you today, passing by my station.” Rookie murmured, his voice softer — huskier— than Jet had ever heard it. And yet, the vulnerability in his voice was unmistakable. “You barely even glanced at me.”Jet moved forward before he could think better of it, eyes determined as he pulled Rookie closer to him. The flipper that Rookie had been using to pull at the buttons of his shirt was trapped between them, and Jet could feel it against his chest, wanting it on his feathers.“I went there for you,” he whispered back as he pushed them both onto the bed, pulling roughly at Rookie’s shirt as the other tugged off Jet’s tie and suit. As soon as they were both unclothed, Jet’s flippers roamed Rookie’s body, gliding over the smooth, green feathers.DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DON'T READ THIS IF YOU'RE A CHILD HERE FOR PURE JET/ROOKIE (JOOKIE) CONTENT
Relationships: Jet Pack Guy/Rookie (Club Penguin)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8
Collections: Anonymous





	1. act 1 - the flippening

“You’re sure you want to do this, right?” Jet asked, concerned. It was weird, seeing him without his signature glasses, but Rookie couldn’t deny how good he looked.;)

“Yeah!” Rookie grinned, but Jet could see the tension, the strain in his usually guileless smile. “You know I want this, I mean why wouldn’t I…”

Rookie’s smile finally wavered, his eyes moving away from Jet and his flipper fiddling with the buttons of his Hawaiian shirt. 

“I saw you today, passing by my station.” Rookie murmured, his voice softer — huskier— than Jet had ever heard it. And yet, the vulnerability in his voice was unmistakable. “You barely even glanced at me.”

Jet moved forward before he could think better of it, eyes determined as he pulled Rookie closer to him. The flipper that Rookie had been using to pull at the buttons of his shirt was trapped between them, and Jet could feel it against his chest, wanting it on his feathers. 

“I went there _for you_ ,” he whispered back as he pushed them both onto the bed, pulling roughly at Rookie’s shirt as the other tugged off Jet’s tie and suit. As soon as they were both unclothed, Jet’s flippers roamed Rookie’s body, gliding over the smooth, green feathers.

“W-wait—“

Jet paused in his ministrations, slippers halting as they roamed down Rookie’s sides. “You okay? Did I hurt you?”

“No,” Rookie breathed out, shaking his head. “No, not at all just— do you even— do you have—“

 _Ah_. Jet moved away, and Rookie whined low in his throat at the loss of touch as his flippers ruffled feathers in their wake. Jet rummaged around his cabinet before finding what he needed. He stepped around the edge of his bed and back to Jet, who stared wide eyed at the fish.

Jet slid a flipper down from the cold head to the base of the tail, gathering the slick he needed that would loosen Rookie up just enough to slip inside. 

He stepped forward and Rookie let himself fall back into the bed, staring up at the ceiling as Jet climbed on as well, settling his body over the other penguin’s. He brought Rookies head down to look at him and ran his beak through the feathers right under the other’s beak, causing Rookie to preen.

“Have you ever done this before,” Jet asked, setting the fish beside them and spreading one flipper flat over Rookies stomach, sinking into the soft fur and blubber of it, while the other trailed downwards to find his hole. 

“Is it that obvious,” Rookie asked, and he tried to make it sound light, a nervous chuckle escaping him, but it got cut short when Jet’s flipper found his entrance.

Jet spread the lubricant around, slickening the area before pressing just the tip of his flipper in. Rookie stiffened. Jet gathered more lube up from the fish before pressing in again, slowly sliding in. He made it an inch before Rookie started breathing heavily, and when Hey looked back up, he was staring down at him with hooded eyes, gripping the bed sheets tightly. 

“D-Don’t stop,” Rookie said, and his head lolled back with a groan as Jet pulled out to the tip again and thrust back in with slow, rocking motions, sliding in deeper than before, until four whole inches of his flipper were inside. 

“Are you okay,” Jet asked, and Rookie could do no more than nod frantically and pant. “I’m going to try something, tell me if it doesn’t feel good.”

Ever so carefully, Jet pushed in just a little more, and then slowly, cautiously, started curling his flipper in. Rookie writhed under him, and Jet held his breath, took that as encouragement, as the breathy moans and the sight of Rookie so thoroughly undone with ruffled feathers and unfiltered sounds sent heat straight down to his core. Rookie’s cocks were erect, trembling as his hips bucked, down onto Jet’s fist, and hitting nothing but cold air above him in the inches between his body and Jet’s. The thought itself sent so much warmth through Jet, he felt his own cocks growing hard inside their sheaths, emerging from the feathers of his groin. 

“God yes, yes, please—“ Rookie whined under him, pelvis jerking up once again. “I need you, please, please—“

“Shh,” Jet soothed, and uncurled his flipper as he pulled out. 

Rookie made a sound, low and desperate in his throat, almost painful at the sheer loss of contact, and his pelvis jerked so suddenly his cocks came in contact with the downy feathers of Jet’s groin, just missing his dripping cocks by inches. Jet squawked involuntarily, then brought his flipper up and pressed down in Rookie’s stomach.

“Stop,” he said sternly, and when Rookie whined, “Hey, just calm down, you won’t be empty for long.” Rookie keened at just the phrasing itself. Jet took the fish again, now almost dry, and gathered the last of its slick and lubed up his own cocks. The cold of it burned against the heat in his hot and made them both twitch, precome dribbling down the sides, and then finally, he set his flippers on either side of Rookie and lowered himself. 

He slid his cocks against Rookie’s entrance, bucking into him shallowly with the upper one, and Rookie moaned softly. “Yes, J-Jet—“ He brought a flipper up to his own cocks and ran it down them, rubbing them in the same flipper. 

Jet rocked his pelvis forward, getting deeper and deeper into Rookie with every second, feeling the heat and slick enveloping his upper cock as it got burrowed into the hilt. 

“Fuck yes,” Rookie said, somewhere between a moan and a shout, and Jet pulled out to the tip before bottoming out all at once. 

He picked up the pace, snapping their pelvises together with each hard thrust, and Rookie lost his grip on his cocks, their pleasure forgotten as he lost himself in the feeling of Jet pummeling into him, keening and gasping and yelling out cries of “Please, just like that, yes Jet— _a-ah please_.”

Jet changed the angle, thrusting down hard and quick, feeling the familiar building in his core, the tightness in his gut like a wave gathering offshore before it crashed— the feeling of Rookie tightening around him as he came in his own orgasm and the sound of his warbled cries through it all brought Jet over the edge. 

“ _Fuck,”_ he groaned, spilling into Rookie, holding himself upright and panting above the other as Rookie just stared up at him with wide eyes and a heaving chest. 

He pulled out, sending white dripping across the bed in a mess that would be awful to clean up later, and worked his beak through the feathers of Rookie’s head again. Rookie sighed into it, tilted his head down to knock against Jet’s own beak as well. Jet indulged him for a little longer before, begrudgingly, getting out of bed. He hushed Rookie’s disappointed whine and grabbed a damp rag, wiping both of them down. Rookie watched his movements with lowered eyelids, the afterglow fading away to exhaustion. 

“Go to sleep baby,” Jet murmured, lightly petting his feathers. Jet’s smile under the soft moonlight was the last thing Rookie remembered before the tendrils of sleep pulled him under.

Rookie woke up to sunlight filtering through the blinds and a chest in front of him. He stared blankly at the downy body in front of him before last night’s events came crashing down on him. 

“You’re finally awake?” Jet soothingly rubbed a flipper along his back.

“This is real?” Rookie echoed in wonder, flippers roving Jet’s shoulders. Jet chuckled before pulling him closer. A couple minutes passed blissfully before another revelation slammed into Rookie, causing him to burst upright in panic. “My mission!” He’d barely stepped a foot out of bed before Jet dragged him back, beak a mere feathers-width away from his ear. 

“You’re not going anywhere.”

epilogue

“Had a rough night?” Rookie jumped at the sudden question, coffee spilling over his mug. “Don’t scare me like that HappyFeet_69!!” 

He’d already struggled with walking to his cubicle and the spilt coffee was not doing him any favors. His coworker winked salaciously before ducking back down to his side. 

Rookie lifted up his damp, stained paperwork dejectedly before pushing himself up to walk to the printer room again. Every step felt like a snake of fire sliding down his back but finally he was in front of the room, staring at the doorknob. 

He took a deep breath and pushed the door open, only to stumble on the door frame and crash into the other penguin in the room.

“Rookie?” He looked up to find Jet’s sunglasses looking down at him, the tips of his beak lifting ever so slightly. A mixture of relief and jealousy flooded him. 

“This is so unfair. How come you can walk just fine but I feel like I’m trudging through ten feet of snow,” he pouted. Jet’s laugh rumbled through Rookie’s body as he set him upright.

“Maybe I’ll bottom next time” 


	2. the inspiration of the monstrosity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an author's note in the form of a cursed chatfic chapter because it's longer than the actual fic. get to know the mad lads behind favorites like unrealistic penguin sex and flippering penguin assholes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry.

Author notes  (WAIT OMG YES IM FORMATTING THIS PROPERLY IN THE FIC  **you decoding this is like watching da Vinci)**

KEY: (good luck)

**BOLD** **\- P**

_ITALICS - A_

REGULAR - R

**This is like typing in front of a teacher**

NICE I AM UR ENGLIHS REACHER UR FINAL PROJECT IS PENGUIN PORN 

**YES** **MRS MISSES WHAT IS THE EQUIVALENT**

jajsjajskak i’ve seen people use Mx idk 

**MX**

aksjaksk it’s ok should i delete all this btw 

**you can do whatever you want sensei B)**

jaksksks SENSEI

**GOT EM**

this is like when anime fandoms call u senpai in ao3 comments 

**STOP AHHHHHHH**

it’s horrible 

_ everything about this is horrible it’s fINE _

**uwu nuzzle typa beat** jansksbdkwjdjwbdjwvehsbdhwjshakehehajebrnsjjsbdjwndhwhdjqnbdqkudiejdhjwnrjwkdhwjdhwjjdjr

**i’m wiping a tear from my eye with how inspirational that was**

thank you i try. god this entire paragraph turned i to an elderitch nightmare 

**what** **does that MEAN elderitch**

sorry eldritch 

**that's too big for my brain buddy**

weird, eerie, but with connotations of being unearthly and perhaps evil or mysteriously sinister

"Night would soon fall, and it was then that the mountainous blasphemy lumbered upon its eldritch course." 

(from H.P. Lovecraft's "The Dunwich Horror") (from urban dictionary’s)

going back through and arranging these snippets to be coherent and make sense was a nightmare 

_ Nothing about this is coherent _

wow thank you big A

_ burn _

:)

_ Bruh i can’t even read it chill  _

**i can’t either and i wrote some of this *breakdances*** _ <\--this is the funniest meme _

_ Rip Big P’s humor  _

**BIG P LETS GOOOOOO**

_ Can we appreciate the fact that three roommates  _ _ disconnected _ _ by covid during these trying times came together through the writing of  _ _ Club Penguin Porn  _ _ true friendship right here folks _

**Roommate bonding but it’s over writing ret porn (what is the ship name??)**

_ This shit doesn’t deserve a ship name (im partial to jookie ngl) _

**JOOKIE**

jungkook “kookie” but it’s the walmart edition instead of gucci

**Stan loona -end scene-**

are we just not gonna mention that this was started by BigA discovering club penguin porn exists and listing off the tags. this entire thing was sprouted f or m the pun “anal flippering” WHY DID U UNDERLINE MY TYPO

_ Can that be the title please _

**ATONE FOR YOUR CRIMES**

FUCK YOU I WILL NOT ATONE. also yeah i’m down to make that the title

_ Anal Flippering it is also Big A is monumentally less funny than Big P _

**I approve of this message**

the hell else am i supposed to call u

_ I am the AO3 DEALER YOU WILL ADDRESS ME BY MY TITLE BITCH _

Cringe.png

**oh i thought you meant i was funnier in general ;-;**

_ Big P, you’re always funnier _

aw look at them uwu

_ Burn _

**Just being homiesexual with the lads**

_ Simp _

**TAKE THAT BACK**

_ i only speaketh the truth _

akhsjqndjwjdjwhdijid 

_ This is getting too long lmao _

**This is the fic and the porn is the note**

_ *cackles*  _

**===8**

**...The dead silence after i typed that killed me**

akshskdjakdk  _ 8===> _

_ Penguin dick _

penguin dick in this fic is like 

===>

===>

_ Why are dick jokes a thing in this chat now please stop _

**Is this a chat fic now???**

_ Feels like one in all the wrong ways _

chat fic but instead of characters it’s just us dicking around

reminds me of the bnha chat fic roleplay we tried and didn’t succeed at

_ Cursed content _

**Just switch us with bnha characters, win-win**

quick assign me kin, which bnha character am i Big P

_ Denki. Disaster Bi. _

Wasn’t asking you but i am indeed flattered. 15 year old me who used to have a crush on him is psyched. (for the audience’s benefit that was a while ago)

_ (what audience) _

**Tryna think of who keyboard smashes, maybe the invis person?**

HAGAKURE????? does she even have a character

**All i know is she’s the “stan twt” cause thats all they showed of her**

_ That’s the tea. R has no character _

WOW THANK YOU. ALSO STAN TWT? i mean ur not wrong 

_ I haven’t laughed this hard in so long _

**BIG R**

we should just put this authors note in a second chapter to its own it’s already so long. yes thank you big R i am indeed uh big or something 

_ We should title it The Inspiration of the Monstrosity  _

**~700 words xd**

SEQUEL FIC? instead of next chapter it’s just another fic. 

_ Bumps us up to 2k _

**How would we even tag this; “slow burn/900k+ words”**

“chat fic” 

_ #i wouldn’t read this if i were you but okay _

wait i need the audience to know it was i who ventured into this brave new frontier and starterted this by writing 900 words of unadulterated penguin porn. i used fish slime as lube. stone me to death. 

_ Yes. but i discovered that Club Penguin lives on in its one true successor: fanfiction _

**You can have it**

_ Actually yeah what big p said _

i don’t want it i just need to be shamed by the internet in some form of karma

the crickets after this sentence

**Feel like there’s a kink somewhere in there**

_ Kink shaming is my kink _

fuck off i do not

**LMBO**

**should i curse to hide my identity even more**

YES

**FRICK YOU**

_ coward _

**h..he..heck**

god this got so long what else can we comment on 

_ No more please i wanna go read some actual high quality fanfiction _

gonna read some PORN???? some high qualiTITTY PORN???????????

_ What are you 12 _

**You’ve got 100 fics to choose from**

100 club penguin fics????? impressed at the nice round number

_ 101 now _

DAMNIT

**ABORT MISSION**

_ Lets make this an original work and see who catches on _

publish it separately???? 

_ Oh lol no _

america explain

**Honestly? We could ;) if we formatted it a bit more**

PUBLISH IT FOR REAL???????

_ I’d die Anal Flippering by BIG P _

**NO**

andhsjdjsjfkejdkkakdnwkskw 

_ cackles _

should we video call while i publish this? or like hit post? you know for effect?

_ Screen share it please _

**^^**

hell yeah bois 

_ Are we gonna zoom _

**Why zoom; i cant use emojis this is so aggravating**

_ Screenshare _

_ Big p communicates like 90% via emoticons _

i love that word. aggravating. anyway uhhh idk if i want our university to uh see this? how about google hangouts we can still screenshare there i think. or kosmi

_ Will it take longer than 30 minutes?? _

**Someone’s gonna doxx us**

1)it won’t take long 2) if someone doxxs me i quit 

**Big r took ten years to format “1)”**

LEAVE ME ALONE ;0;

_ Big r more like big RIP _

CRINGE DOT JPEG nothing about that was cringe btw i was just being mean

**Simp XD i gotta resort to xd now**

_ uwu _

calling me a simp for not wanting my friends to think i hate them?

_ Accurate tho _

**Ofc**

ex dee

_ fr tho can we just post it now lol  _

is big P done with the ending?

**AHH WAIT IFDJADSFJAKSDJF**

_ BIG P come on boi _

jadhwjdjwjdjwjskwksjwkekwn

**HOW TO I END THIS**

“i wuv u ex dee nuzzle”

_ please don’t _

WAIT WE SHOULD COPY PASTE A VERSION OF BIG P’S SECTION WITH ALL HER COMMENTARY KEPT IN. (i feel like the entire time big P wrote this she was that one office meme of michael going “IIIIIIIIII AM GOING TO KILL MYSELF”)

He pulled out, sending white dripping across the bed in a mess that would be awful to clean up later, and worked his beak through the feathers of Rookie’s head again. Rookie sighed into it, tilted his head down to knock against Jet’s own beak as well. Jet indulged him for a little longer before, begrudgingly, getting out of bed. He hushed Rookie’s disappointed whine and grabbed a damp rag, wiping both of them down (idk what the duck— PENGUIN haha puns— i’m doing). Rookie watched his movements with lowered eyelids, the afterglow fading away to exhaustion. 

“Go to sleep baby,” Jet murmured, lightly petting his feathers (i was tryna do that thing where you brush someones hair off their forehead but i realized penguins don’t have either). Rookie could feel the tendrils of sleep pulling him - some transition idk

Rookie woke up to sunlight filtering through the blinds and a chest in front of him. He stared blankly at the downy (?? what do feathers feel like downy? feathered?) body in front of him before last night’s events came crashing down on him. 

“You’re finally awake?” (this is a ref to the skyrim meme lol) Jet soothingly rubbed a flipper along his back.

“This is real?” Rookie echoed in wonder, flippers roving Jet’s shoulders. Jet chuckled before pulling him closer. A couple minutes passed blissfully before another revelation slammed into Rookie, causing him to burst upright in panic. “My mission!!” He’d barely taken a foot out of bed before Jet YOINKED him roughly back, beak a mere feathers-width away from his ear (do penguins have ears i feel like i should have researched penguin anatomy before writing this). 

“You’re not going anywhere.” end scene unless you wanna do the waddle thing 

epilogue

Actually you know what? I’m going on a strike 

“Had a rough night?” Rookie jumped at the sudden question, coffee spilling over his mug. “Don’t scare me like that _insert penguin name idk benjamin??_!!” He’d already struggled with walking to his cubicle(? Idk how offices work) and the spilt coffee was not doing him any favors. His coworker winked salaciously (idk what this means but it sounds like smth i’ve seen ill look it up later) before ducking back down to his side. Idk how to continue this ;-; uh Rookie lifted up his damp, stained paperwork dejectedly before pushing himself up to walk to the printer room again. Every step felt like a snake of fire sliding down his back but finally he was in front of the room, staring at the doorknob. He took a deep breath and pushed the door open, only to stumble on the door frame and crash into the other penguin in the room.

I’m adding way too much but its ok cause now its like a sitcom

“Rookie?” He looked up to find Jet’s sunglasses looking down at him, the tips of his beak lifting ever so slightly. A mixture of relief and jealousy flooded him. 

“This is so unfair. How come you can walk just fine but I feel like I’m trudging through ten feet of snow (See what i did there haha funny),” he pouted. Jet’s laugh rumbled through Rookie’s body as he set him upright. OH I GO IT “Maybe I’ll bottom next time” OK IM DONE LETS GO THAT S IT WRAP IT UP GUYS

**Author's Note:**

> please leave comments we just want to not suffer alone


End file.
